- Title: Forbidden Gift
- Subtitle: My Story of Feminization and Being a Victim of SRA – inspired by a real life story of spiritual catalyst Teal Swan
- Author: Yulia Yu. Sakurazawa
- Category: transgender horror, mtf, lesbian
Trevor Barlow is a pretty boy born with extrasensory abilities. He has dark hair and teal blue eyes. Trevor is neglected by his parents and is ostracized by the community that believes him to be Satan. As a result, the misunderstood child becomes silent and withdrawn. Trevor’s alienation is taken advantage of by family physician and secret pedophile Dr. Jacob Fallon who manages to win Trevor’s parents’ trust and gain informal custody of the troubled child. Once he has gained systematic access to Trevor, Dr. Fallon brainwashes Trevor into believing that he is the reincarnate of the wicked biblical queen, Jezebel. Over the next few years, Trevor is forcibly feminized and is now called Tessa. Tessa suffers horrendous abuse at the hands of his guardian for ten long years.
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My Story of Feminization and Being a Victim of SRA
inspired by the story of spiritual catalyst Teal Swan
by Yulia Yu. Sakurazawa
Dr.Fallon stabbed a lean unkempt man in front of me.
“Kiss him in the lips and get his pants down, Tessa” he orders me.
I have to do what he tells me to. Otherwise, he would kill my parents and their siblings, as he had told me many times in the past.
Slowly, I crawl to the bleeding corpse and kiss his cold lips and unhook his jeans pants.
“Do it now, Tessa.”
With my lace one piece dress on, I have to get take off my shorts, get his pants down and struggle with his withered penis until I “die” in ecstasy.
I was tempted to do what he had ordered me just like many times in the past, fearing that Dr. Fallon would execute his threat of killing my family. But today I had an epiphany. Dr. Fallon had been lying to me about everything: my so-called past life, my identity and also about my sexuality. I wasn’t Jezebel, the bad woman of the bible who had to pay for fighting against God. Neither was I a woman called Tessa. I was Trevor – Trevor Barlow. Yet for the past 6 or 7 years, Dr. Fallon had forced me to live in a female body.
I realized that Dr. Fallon had been lying to me all these years because he’d told me that the corpses I was forced to have sex with were those of people who had died a natural death. However, with the Ketamine effect wearing off, I realized he had lied. If Dr. Fallon had lied to me about this, it was likely that he had lied to me about everything else. He had gained the trust of my family, earned systematic access to me as a young boy and had brainwashed me into believing a number of untruths, including the lie that I was a girl trapped in a male body. He had injected female hormones into my body and eventually transformed me into a female. A genital reconstruction surgery conducted by a doctor (also belonging to the Satanic Cult) had completed my feminization process.
Dr. Fallon wasn’t the amiable, avuncular family physician that he overtly claimed to be. He wasn’t one who helped “sinners” like me atone. With utter shock I realized that my “mentor” was no more than a common pedophile, possibly one with a multiple personality disorder. Dr. Fallon was a mentally ill person, but was also a highly convincing speaker….a very dangerous combination… He had managed to convince my parents to informally hand over my custody to him. Likewise, Dr. Fallon had enough charisma to polarize a number of fellow pedophiles into the Satanic Cult.
My only concern now was to escape this man. He could no longer exercise mind control over me. When Dr. Fallon was diverted for a minute, I scampered away from the basement into the garage barefooted, jumped into a blue Cadillac Sedan and drove away–for miles. I didn’t know where I was going, but I just drove on. My right thigh, which Dr. Fallon had cut with a knife, was bleeding copiously under my white skirt. I knew I needed help, but didn’t know where to go.
But I certainly knew I wasn’t going back to my parents. My being different from the others had driven a wedge between me and them—a wedge that nothing in the world could bridge. I still couldn’t forgive mom and dad for making Dr. Fallon my guardian of sorts. If they couldn’t understand their own child, was it fair to let the family physician take custody of him?
I wish they had been more understanding of me and more alert to Dr. Fallon’s machinations. I wish they had suspected what he and the other cult members had been doing to me all these years and had saved me from them. I wish my parents had been my guardian angels who came swooping down to help me when I was in danger. But, no.
The damage had been done. I was unchangeably and irrevocably damaged.
“But you have to live, Trevor!” a voice inside me yelled “you have to use your gifts and your suffering to help heal others!”
“But how do I do that?” I yelled back “Besides, where do I go now?”
The image of a willowy girl with a tomboyish manner flashed in front of my vision – Mia Allen! I had met her at a party seven years ago. In a bid to broaden my non-existent social circle as a teenager, my parents had forced me to attend a party hosted by the son of an acquaintance. When I reached his house, a maypole of a girl with platinum blonde hair had opened the door, and had whizzed past me shrieking and screaming rambunctiously. I remember thinking: “what a weirdo!”. But as we went inside and said hi to each other; I realized that there was a pure, unadulterated kindness in Mia’s hazel eyes that nothing could touch. She was as sweet, innocent and compassionate as a child. I instinctively knew I could trust her. Later in the night, Mia and I had gone skating together. I had met her on one or two occasions since. Mia had once even invited to her house and I had visited her for ten minutes or so.
Yes, Mia was the right person to go to. But would she recognize me in a female body? Would she believe all that Dr. Fallon and the other cult members had done to me?
I was getting dizzier by the minute and unable to think right. I vaguely remember driving for another mile, pulling up in front of Mia’s home and frantically banging on her door. Mia opened the door and was shocked to see me bleeding heavily.
“Oh, my goodness!” she exclaimed “Let’s get you some help”.
I remember her ringing for the ambulance before I passed out.
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